I only saw gay saunas in porn sites and animations I’ve watched over the years. I’d never been in one until a friend of mine brought me to one as his “birthday present” to me.
What a present it was— I discovered a lot in just the two hours we were there. I should admit though, I might have looked like a fish out of water because I had no idea what I should be doing.
So, if you don’t want to be like me, read through my 7 tips so you can fully enjoy the joys of being in a gay sauna.
Gay Sauna?
If straights have rub-and-tug parlors, queers have gay saunas or gay bathhouses. It’s literally not about saunas or cleaning yourself.
It’s a playground, a pickup joint, a sex venue.
Unlike what other fearmongers say, you can’t be forced into doing anything you’re not comfortable with in gay saunas.
But, since it’s a sex-positive place, you’ll look out of place. Imagine attending a buffet and not eating anything.
Top Tips for Your Next Gay Sauna Visit
There are many unwritten rules when you step into the steamy fogs of gay saunas. So, let me give you a heads-up.
Wear a Jockstrap
Jockstraps are a big deal in gay saunas. They show off all the important parts and draw in more eyes.
It shows off your assets— front and back.
No one’s gonna stop you if you wear a pink bikini if that’s your style. But gay men love men.
And there’s nothing more manly than a jockstrap. It’s got that rugged, sporty vibe that drives us queers crazy.
Black jockstraps, in particular, are like the tuxedos of gay saunas— super classy and always in style.
Expect the Expected
If you’re heading to a gay sauna, chances are high you’re looking for some steamy, fun times.
You won’t go to the candy store and not see any sweets. Like, come on! The whole place is set up for hot and heavy action.
You’ll find guys who are just as eager and excited as you are, just as you expected.
Now, if you’re more into people-watching rather than joining in, that’s totally cool.
But it’s super important to be upfront about it. Nobody has time for mixed signals.
Don’t string folks along or tease an entire room. Keep it simple and drama-free, and everyone will have a good time.
Everyone Comes There Often
Lemme talk about the regulars. Some guys might say, “Oh, I don’t come to the gay sauna that often”?
Yeah, don’t believe them. Every time you go, you’ll probably see familiar faces.
It’s a not-so-secret club everyone loves but pretends they’re not part of.
What’s the good thing about this?
If you spot someone who tickles your fancy but you’re too busy riding someone else to notice him leave,
chances are, he’ll be there again the next time. You have multiple chances to shoot your shot in gay saunas— figuratively and literally.
So, if you miss out on some fun with a particular guy today, don’t sweat it.
There’s always another steamy visit around the corner. It’s nice to know that your potential playmates are likely to come back.
It makes things more fun and fantasies alive and kicking.
Keep Convos at a Minimum
Gay saunas aren’t the place to talk about unsexy things.
Forget about your aunt’s latest knitting project or the stock market’s performance.
You’re not visiting a psychiatrist, either. Leave deep, emotional unloadings at the door.
The atmosphere in a gay sauna is all about living in the moment and the unholy callings of the flesh,
not about getting bogged down with endless chatter.
Just like in bars where some guys may not say much but have a whole lot more to express in the restroom stalls.
The main point in gay saunas is putting your mouth to very good use.
If talking can’t be avoided, keep your chatter to a minimum. Stick to the gay talk essentials.
Some acceptable things to say or talk about include:
- Dirty talk
- “I’m coming”
- Grunts
- Moans
- Growls
- Profanities (brought by passion and intense stimulations)
Don’t break the immersion of the other gays around you by being a yapper— shut your trap and let others use it instead!
No Glasses
This may kind of be a weird tip, but my first guy was this dude who kept on bumping into walls.
I thought he was high, turns out, he was just not wearing his glasses. I mean, can’t blame him, really.
Glasses fog up fast in saunas!
Even those fancy anti-fog glasses don’t work well because they can interfere with all the naughty fun.
Plus, hey, most guys in a gay sauna would rather look hot than see perfectly.
BTW, the glasses dude was awesome with his tongue.
It’s pretty common to see other gay men bumping into walls or each other— it’s both funny and, honestly, kind of cute.
If you see a hottie wandering around, go ahead and grab his attention, then pull him close.
It can turn an awkward moment into a sexy one real quick.
This place is all about fun and excitement, so let your glasses sit this one out.
Don’t Hog the Bathrooms
Okay, listen up, loverboy. Gay saunas have spots like toilets and showers that everyone needs to use.
Not everything in gay saunas is for explicit boinking.
Don’t be that guy who’s doing the dirty in the cr while others’ bladders are about to explode,
waiting outside and banging on the door for you to do the nasty someplace else. It’s rude, and guess what?
You can get banned for that. Even if you don’t get banned, you’ll earn a bad reputation. Nobody wants to be known as the toilet hog.
The same rule goes for showers. Some guys are in a hurry; maybe they’ve got a hot date next or just need to get back to work
. Don’t block their way by taking forever in there. You don’t want to be that dude who’s holding everyone up.
Let them do their thing, clean up, and get out— so they can too.
Finish What You Start
Gay saunas are about having loads of fun— loads. But how can you have fun if your partner isn’t letting you finish?
Imagine being in the middle of some steamy action, and suddenly, he just bails out. Not cool.
You can’t just leave anyone high and dry in the saunas.
Leaving someone hanging like that can kill the vibe for everyone.
Next time, gays might steer clear of you— they don’t want to be left disappointed too!
They’ll remember you as that one guy who couldn’t follow through. And in a secret club like gay saunas?
News travels fast. Might as well wear a sign that says “gay flake” and announce it yourself.
But hey, there are exceptions. If someone’s trying to make you do something you’re not comfortable with, that’s a whole different thing.
Don’t feel bad for stopping— your safety and comfort come first, always.
If that happens, find the sauna manager or staff and let them know what’s up so the other person can’t flip the story and say you’re just doing some CNC play.
More Gay Sauna Tips
I have many other tips, but here are my most fun:
- Don’t do the deed in the whirlpool (unless you want a heart attack).
- The longer you stay in the sauna, the more attractive you become.
- “I just came” is a perfectly valid excuse.
- Big dicks get more attention at first (it’s a sauna). But if you have a small weenie and know how to work it, the gays would know after a demonstration.
- There’s an unspoken rule that you should do the nasty stuff with those you don’t know. So if you came with a friend, better separate ways early.
- Never borrow anyone’s sex toys! Especially if it’s chastity cages! That’s just tasteless, and eww!
- Try visiting the gay saunas without ingesting alcohol or drugs. It’s nice to be the only sober gay once in a while.
- Go rest in the “Resting Lounge,” but don’t spend all of your time there!
- Staying with one gay for at least two hours makes everyone else assume you’re committed. Why would they start a fight with a taken omega?
- It’s weird to watch others at the tub— just get in and participate.
- Say, thank you to muscular men in the gay saunas. They’re working out for other gays’ pleasure.
